Behind in Life? This 5-Step System Helped Me Make Up Lost Time (Faster Than I Thought Possible)

 

Many people wake up at some point—30, 35, 40—look around, and realize they're far from living the life they want.

I was one of them.

At 28, I looked around and saw I was nowhere near where I knew I could be. I was meeting others that were making progress around me. More money, better relationships, more purpose, better results.

I had been "busy", and I had gotten a little bit further, but the future was looking far from promising if I stayed on that the track I was on. Especially for the amount of effort I thought I was actually putting in.

The shift happened when I hit a point where I had two options: basically, give up on it all, or figure it the fuck out and go all in on getting everything I knew I was capable of.

Internal freedom. External freedom. Money. Competence. Confidence. Exploration. Adventure. Living. 

Not just surviving. 

I chose all in.

I started by making some serious changes within my control. As months passed I started paying attention to what was actually working. Over time, I realized I was following a pattern—a system I'd built without even knowing it. Once I saw it clearly, I doubled down on it.

 

In 18 months, I:

• Got completely sober—I stopped all my substance use habits after 15 years—there were several
• Finally fully recovered from my motorcycle accident and got my health and fitness to the best it's ever been
• Finally started to feel comfortable and extremely confident in everything I do—all of my life before it was the opposite.
• Finally took the leap to start a business that aligns with my values, passion, and skill set (had no idea what I was doing)
• Lived abroad the entire time, learned who I really was and could be, and even learned a new language in the process

 

I basically put myself through my own rehab, therapy, college, and a training program all at the same time. It was intense, but it was an insane amount of growth.

This isn't necessarily about working harder. It's about working with leverage. And if you feel behind right now, this system will show you how to start making up for that time—and get you on a better track than you were probably ever shown.

 

Here's the Exact 5-Step System I Used:

1. Get clear direction—(purpose & intent)
2. Clear the way—(remove unnecessary friction)
3. Take action—(break barriers)
4. Get feedback and apply data—(reiterate & refine)
5. Do it consistently—(build systems)

 

The Real Problem

The problem for you, like old me, is that you're likely lacking deliberate action towards something clear and doing it consistently—Clarity → Action → Consistency. Like months and years of consistency.

So here are the 5 steps to getting ahead in life faster.

 

Step 1: Get Clear Direction

 

The Problem

If you're drifting and living without purpose or intention, what's your criteria for deciding how you should and shouldn't spend your time? Whatever's flashy and sounds good?

That's not gonna work for 99.9% of people. That just leads to wasted time and chasing pleasure—which is not synonymous with success, growth, and personal development.

If you want to stay on track, you have to learn to say no to what doesn't get you closer to your target. That's impossible if you lack decision-making criteria.

If you don't know where you're going or what you have to do to get there, you're not gonna get very far. You're gonna be going in circles at most. You need something to clearly point at and move towards.

 

The Fix

You need a target so clear that every decision becomes binary: Does this get me closer, or not?

Not a vague goal like "be successful" or "get in shape." A specific, measurable target:

• "Build a $10K/month business by December"
• "Deadlift 405 lbs within 6 months"
• "Publish my book by Q2"

 

Why This Works

Clarity gives you a clear filter for your decision making. When you know where you're going, you can instantly recognize what's pulling you off course. Your values and actions align. You stop wasting time on things that feel productive but lead nowhere.

"If you don't know where you're going, every decision becomes whatever's flashy and sounds good in the moment."

Direction first.

 

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Action Step

Write down your one target for the next 90 days.
Make it specific. Make it measurable. Put it where you'll see it daily.

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If you really don't where you're going or where to start, I recommend start by taking control of your health and your time. From there you'll figure a lot of things out naturally. Learn how the HDC-100 Challenge can help you get started on building momentum towards something. 

 

Step 2: Clear the Way

 

The Problem

There's good friction and bad friction. Bad friction just wears you down, disorients, and distracts you. It actively works against you and where you want to go.

I genuinely believe most people are operating with about 25% access to these critical personal resources—time, energy, and attention—that they could be devoting to their own progress and growth.

And the thing is, you just can't outwork bad systems.
There's too much inefficiency. The effort to output ratio becomes terrible. Most people give up on change and goals because they never figured out how to be efficient. 

 

The Fix

Remove unnecessary friction.

Honestly, this is step 0 if you want to live a great life and get ahead.

I created the 22-Point Friction Framework. It maps every area where you're wasting resources:

Time Drains:

• Social media rabbit holes
• Unstructured mornings
• Recreational substance use and recovery
• Inability to priortize

Energy Drains:

• Poor sleep hygiene
• Poor physical state management
• Clutter and disorganization
• Unresolved conflicts

Attention Drains:

• Open loops—unfinished tasks
• Decision fatigue
• Constant context switching
• Unmanaged stress

 

Why This Works

Removing friction is often more powerful than adding effort. You're not trying to be superhuman—you're just becoming human without all the extra weight holding you down.

"You can get ahead of 40% of people just by removing the 100lb weight vest of unnecessary friction."

You can get ahead of 40% of people just by removing the 100-pound weight vest of unnecessary friction.

 

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Action Step

List your top 3 friction points right now.
What's actively working against you? Address one this week.

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Step 3: Take Action

The Problem

First off, reading and studying is kind of action, but putting yourself out there on the field is what we're really talking about.

You know what to do. You're just not doing it.

There's always a reason. Fear of failure. Fear of judgment. Perfectionism. Imposter syndrome. But here's the thing: these aren't real barriers—they're outdated defense mechanisms.

 

The Story Behind Your Resistance

At some point, you learned that putting yourself out there was risky. Maybe you got laughed at. Maybe you failed publicly. Maybe someone you trusted criticized you.

Your brain created a protection mechanism: Don't try, don't get hurt.

That made sense when you were 8. It's destroying you at 30.

For most people, this means first becoming aware of and breaking down barriers between you and that action in the real world.

Especially if you're doing something new or something that feels important or critical to you, it adds additional perceived weight and risk on top of it. But you should know that that's perceived and a fabrication of the mind—not necessarily real risk.

Through our lives, we develop defense mechanisms that turn into present-day barriers that operate subconsciously. They run so deep that they just feel like long-known internal truths.

There's a reason you have apprehension. There's a reason you developed resistance to acting in certain situations. There's a reason these things make you nervous and anxious. There's a reason they make you act in ways you don't quite understand.

But for most people, these are simply outdated defense mechanisms.

 

The Fix

You have to make the subconscious conscious.

To overcome them, you have to get honest and clear with yourself. Give yourself space to identify where the root of those stem from so you can dig them out and burn them.

The event or emotion that created all this was never addressed and processed, so it's still surfacing years and decades later. Which is crazy, right?

"Your bad birthday party trauma when you were 8 years old is still affecting you at 30."

Your bad birthday party trauma when you were 8 years old is still affecting you at 30. 

 

Ask yourself:

• What's the actual worst-case scenario if I fail?
• Where is this fear coming from?
• Is this fear protecting me, or limiting me?

Usually, the worst case is: nothing changes. You're exactly where you are now. Maybe a little embarrassed. 

The standard case? You learn, grow, and move closer to your goal.

The best case? You succeed and unlock a new opportunity and chapter of life you couldn't have even imagined before.

 

Why This Works

With reps, you can go from awkward to competent to excellent. But you can't skip the awkward phase. You have to be willing to suck before you're good.

And with reps of anything, we can get from awkward to fucking awesome with enough practice.

 

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Action Step

Identify one action you've been avoiding.
Do it imperfectly. Just start.
What action have you been avoiding?

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Step 4: Get Feedback and Apply Data

The Problem

Action without analysis can get off course fast.

Action is important because it produces feedback and realistic high-fidelity data, but there are requirements for this to be useful.

If you don't know what HRV means or the relevance of it, then that data point—which could be very useful and insightful—becomes essentially useless.

You need a way to make sense of the data you collect, whether that's numbers or subjective experience.

 

The Fix

Action gives you feedback. Feedback gives you data. And data is god.

We accomplish this through learning mental models and theories. These are frameworks for rationale and decision making.

Mental Models to Learn:

• Second-order thinking: What are the consequences of the consequences?
• Pareto Principle: 80% of results come from 20% of efforts—which 20%?
• Margin of Safety: Build buffers into everything
• Inversion: Instead of asking "How do I succeed?" ask "How would I guarantee failure?"

The next level above learning these is integrating and embodying them into how you automatically think and process the world.

 

Why This Works

Charlie Munger was huge on using mental models to guide effective decision making when it came to investing millions of dollars.

There needs to be structure to make sense of the random points of data so you can actually improve your process, become more efficient and effective, and be able to decide how to proceed.

"Data is god. But only if you know how to read it."

Charlie Munger invested millions using mental models. You can use them to invest in yourself.
Data plus frameworks equals better decisions.

 

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Action Step

Pick one metric to track this week.
Weight. Revenue. Hours focused on task.
Then review it weekly and adjust your processes.

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Step 5: Do It Consistently

The Problem

Motivation fades. Discipline wavers. Life gets hard.

If you're relying on willpower, you've already lost.

 

The Fix

Consistency. Consistency. Consistency.

Practice, practice, practice.

The easiest way to do this? Think of everything in systems.

Schedules. Repeatable processes. Simplify. Habit stack. Make things habitual and automatic to a point where you're operating the basics at a very high level literally just because you made it normal.

Examples of Systems:

• Health system: Gym at 6 AM, meal prep Sundays, bed by 10 PM
• Business system: Content Monday, outreach Tuesday, creation Wednesday, analysis Friday
• Learning system: 30 minutes reading before work, one podcast during commute, one course on weekends

Maintaining your health and vitality is a system of exercise, diet, and sleep. Mastering your profession, skills, and becoming rich is a system of trying, failing, risking, learning, applying, and reiteration.

All of this in these 5 steps is our system for getting ahead in life.

 

Why This Works

Go through this 5-step system for action and reiterate over and over again. There's no way that you can start this and not start making progress.

The central theme of all this funnels back to not only taking consistent action, but refining your processes and getting the most returns on your efforts. This is what leverage is.

The super successful don't outwork you through sheer willpower. They've made high performance habitual. Their "effortless" baseline would exhaust most people—but it's automatic for them.

"The super successful have a perceived effortless baseline that outperforms 99% of the world—because they made excellence automatic."

This is how the super successful have a perceived effortless baseline that outperforms 99% of the world.

 

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Action Step

Identify one daily action that moves you forward.
Schedule it. Do it for 30 days without skipping.

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The Compounding Advantage

If you want to get ahead, that literally means you have to take more steps and/or bigger strides in the same amount of time as those to the left and right of you.

 

You can get ahead of:

• 50% just by starting to move in a straight line
• 90% by removing unnecessary friction
• 99% by building systems and refining them with data

 

It's Not Just Financial Compounding

People think about compounding as solely financial, but compounding applies to self-investment just as much.

If I read only 1 book a month, in 5 years I'd have read 60 books when most adults may have read 2-5.

Or taking control of my time, energy, and attention consistently on a daily basis—using 90% of it towards only what aligns with my values and targets—while the rest of the world invests 5-25% intentionally towards something positive. If that.

Do you understand how much of an advantage all of this can give you by approaching life this way?

 

This Doesn't Make Life Boring

Now you might be thinking—this sounds like a lot of work. It sounds complicated. But here's the thing...

And don't be mistaken—this doesn't make life bland or boring. It actually produces the opposite.

Maybe when you're trying to dial in these new systems, it'll feel foreign and uncomfortable and sure, boring at times. But once your identity shifts and connects with the fact that everything you do has a purpose towards something, you'll see the adjectives "bland" and "boring" are just words used by people who can't sit with the idea of silence for 10 minutes. The ones that are jerked left in right by the people up in their high towers. 

And that's a very dangerous place to find yourself.

  

Your Window of Opportunity

"Most people die by 25 and are buried at 70. From 25-40, you have an insane window to get ahead."

Most people die by 25 and are buried at 70.

From 25 to 40, you have an insane amount of opportunity to get ahead as you learn more about yourself and the world. Depending on where you're at, getting started might feel hard and uncomfortable. But once you start, your momentum will build as the weight of your habits and systems begin to push you forward even when you don't want to. That's power and effective forward planning. 

This is the power of systems. And this is the power of our 5-Step System for Action.

 

Take Action Now

So those are the 5 steps:

1. Get clear direction — Pick your one target for the next 100 days
2. Remove friction — Identify your top 3 friction points
3. Take action — Do the thing you've been avoiding
4. Use data — Track one key metric this week
5. Build systems — Make one action automatic

 

Want the Full 22-Point Friction Framework?

This comprehensive framework shows you exactly where you're losing time, energy, and attention—and how to plug those leaks immediately.

→ Get the Friction & Flow Framework

 

Want to See How You Can Make 1-2 years progress in 100 Days?

Get the HDC-100 Challenge quickstart guide to start planning how you can start directing your next chapter now.
→ Explore the HDC-100 Challenge

 

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